Wednesday, December 22, 2010

Get Out! Get Out Now!

Every night I work a closer-shift it's the same damn thing. The cashiers come on the PA and announce 15 minutes before closing time that it's basically time to wrap things up, find what you want, pay and get out. This is probably my most productive time the whole shift. I'm like an assembly line telling people where to go and get their shitty "Made cheap in China, who cares about our economy" product.

But it's never good enough. The 10 minute warning, the 5 minute warning, and finally the closing announcement. Now I understand (yes I actually do!) if they're old and decrepit and slowly making their ways towards the cashiers. But what I don't understand is the salmon I find swimming up stream to the back of the store 10 minutes after we closed. And it's always the same stupid argument and justification.

Me: Sir/Mam, the store closed 10 minutes ago"
Customer: "It's OK, I just need to get _____"
Me: "No, we are closed. Please make your ways toward the exit"
Customer: "But I just need it. can you tell me where it is?"
Sometimes I escort them, because I don't want to start a fight. Not that I wouldn't like too. And of course they take that as a sign of weakness and linger where ever they find the item asking inane questions 80% of the time that can be answered by reading the box.
Finally I just say " The cashiers are closing in two minutes. After that you can't buy anything" Then I chuckle to myself as I see a flash of anxiety flush over their face and like a junkie threatened to have his fix taken away they sprint towards the cashiers.

But we have this stupid fucking idea that "The customers always right" shoved down our throat from management who themselves are idiots. I compare them on par to a pet that learned a series of interesting tricks but don't really understand the purpose of doing them.


  1. The last time I worked in retail was 1999 but i imagine the frustration is still the same. This time of year it's only magnified. You shouldn't be punished because a customer waited to the last minute to do their christmas shopping.